i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Randomize
