i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I just googled if crying burns calories
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
