I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
i think i just lost a toe
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
