Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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