: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize