There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
Randomize
