i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
he fucked my hip out of place.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
