if i can run in heels then i can drive
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
love makes seman taste better
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
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