Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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