her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize