Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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