At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Randomize
