"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Randomize
