put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize