forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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