the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
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