I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
