he wants to bone in the snuggie
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
