I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
