I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
where are you?
Hypothermia
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
