May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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