Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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