do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
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