I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Randomize
