You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize
