i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize