drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Text me some of your sweat
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
