I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Randomize
