when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
You've changed since you got that strap on
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Randomize
