It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Randomize
