Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
