i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
