normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Randomize