Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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