I seem to have left my pride at pride
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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