if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Randomize
