Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Randomize