last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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