i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Randomize
