If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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