I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
