Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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