At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
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