I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
Randomize
