Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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