just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Randomize
