If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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