I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Randomize
