It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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