just survived the first fart of the relationship.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
